The Great American Job Search

The Great American Job Search. What a depressing venture. I have just spent the last two hours immersed in the ocean of monster.com (appropriately named, I have now concluded) and have come up to the surface completely robbed of any excitement that may have been buzzing previously. I am the opposite of excited. The word doom comes to mind. Doom and an intense feeling of lethargy. What I really feel like doing right now is sitting down with a plate of cookies, and zoning out on syndicate laugh tracts while stuffing my face.
The issue is not so much that there aren’t jobs out there for a college grad. Hell, if you have experience in the field you want to work in—you’re good to go! Grab a job and start stomping up that gold-plated ladder. Oh yeah, and by the way—if you didn’t acquire any experience while you were getting your degree—you’re screwed. Oh unless you want to walk door to door and sell Blazer tickets. Yes, of course we call that marketing—what else would it be?
There’s that reliable rub for you. There’s always a rub, isn’t there?
My only hope in this whole mess is networking. I’ve become sick of everyone constantly talking about how ‘it’s all about networking’. I'm sick of myself saying it! The term is right up there with ‘the early bird gets the worm’ and ‘the grass is always greener on the other side.’ Networking. Let’s just call it what it is—using people. Not that I have a problem with using people—I wish I had a cool enough job to where people would be inclined to use me! The thing is I’ve tried using my contacts to get hooked up with better jobs and it never really pans out. They always end up doing things like somehow finding me the ‘top secret’ website address in which to apply. Good thing, that would have been a tough Google search. Or they excitedly tell me that their HR recruiter welcomes me to apply and if there are any openings down the road, they’ll call me. Well, maybe I have a streak of pessimism in me, but somehow I just don’t see that call being made.
I realize that I am sounding really negative here. My current mood is being smeared all over this blog and I apologize. If I someday land a great job, I vow to write another blog that evokes only joyous feelings of daisy petals and puppy dogs. Or furry blue-eyed kittens, for all the cat people out there. In the meantime, if you happen to know how to get me a job in marketing, PR, advertising, communications, or media buying (see, I’m not that picky)—give me a call. I would like to network.